It’s true. I’ve come into this game a little late, so I have a LOT of catching up to do. Four score and thirty-some odd days is a long time to have avoided all manner of holiday cooking. But this year I opened house and home and invited those closest (and least judgmental) to join in our feast. A feast prepared by moi! Such brave souls. Let us give thanks that all left with full bellies and not a lick of food poisoning.

So here is what I learned.

1. Next time you’re at the grocery store browsing the produce section and you think to yourself, “Huh, why are these already cleaned and prepped green beans so damn expensive?!”…


Let me assure you. They are worth every damn penny.

2. Child labor is free. Be sure to utilize it, then blame cute child if things don’t turn out right.


3. They make these already prepared. They’re called Planter’s mixed nuts. Crazy. I know.


4. It’s imperative that the hostess maintains her charm and sense of humor at all times.


Fa la la, lah dee dah.


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